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i guess bridget must have thought i was serious about that plate. i came home to find my keyboard full of water and some security tape on her bedroom door so she'll know if anyone goes in there.

HEY BRIDGET I DIDN'T TAKE YOUR PLATE. I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE YOUR PLATE IS. JUST LIKE I ALREADY TOLD YOU. PLEASE DON'T DESTROY ANY MORE OF KRIS' PROPERTY (yeah, it was his keyboard). KTHX!

and, yes, i did go into your room to turn your radiator down. seeing how you're not living here AND you're not paying for gas, i didn't see the need to waste my money on your empty room. if you would have asked, i would have told you.

but, i know, you're too intimidated to talk to me.

this whole situation still amuses but confounds me. bridget says i hate her, but i have never said so and i don't. bridget thinks i'm so mean, but all i've done since we lived here was stop talking to her like she said she wanted. she shut off the utilities with little to no notice. and she accused me of stealing from her. she's mad at everyone else in the house because they like me better. well, that's hardly my fault! maybe she should try to be more likeable and less demanding.

can't wait 'til she's gone

"i can't find one of my plates. they were here yesterday. do you know where it is."

yes, bridget, i keep track of all our dishes, thanks for bothering me at work.

but, wait! now i hear she thinks i did something with it. ha! yes, i hid it under my bed, because that's such a terrible thing to do! man, i got you good, fucker! would i really come clean to you if i did something to your stuff? how fucking stupid are you?

apparently you've planned on moving out for months; why not pack your shit in advance? life is hard. i know. boo hoo.

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