sWell (shakewell) wrote,
sWell
shakewell

it could be boredom, eyestrain or anger; either way, i can't see straight

i literally stumbled onto an online text of fear and loathing in las vegas: a savage journey to the heart of the american dream. it's full of typos, but has successfully staved off boredom, today, as i limit myself to five minutes of actual work at a time.

you may remember those days when i was insanely busy during my 12-hour days. well, that time has passed.

now, i have an extremely limited amount of work to process. at first, i was just plowing through it like i've always done and then killing time on the web the rest of the day, but, as the work continued to dwindle, those empty hours began to pile up. there is something quite awful about doing ten minutes worth of work at 7:00 a.m. and then spending the next 7 hours and 50 minutes wishing you had something--anything--productive to do.

so, while i do not dread the work i have to do, i'm using some anti-procrastination techniques and setting limits on my work time. now, i'm only allowing myself five minutes to work at a time and each five-minute period must be followed by at least one hour of not working. it's still painfully boring at times, but it has actually made my web time more productive. writing this post, for example should take me a good amount of time as i struggle to be informative, witty and hyperlinked.

xxx

i finally interviewed for a permanent, salaried position at martin marietta this week. they're supposed to call me back today with a decision. i don't know why they wouldn't offer it to me, except that i probably wasn't all that convincing that i actually want the job (because i'm pretty sure i don't).

it's not that it's not a good job--it's more money and it's better benefits--but it's just not the job i want. it's based out of a different plant than the one where i currently temp and it's the float position to cover vacations and sick days for any of the indiana location. so, while 90% of what i love about that job is the people at the noblesville plant, i almost certainly would never work with them again for more than a few days of the year. i would, however, get to learn all of the office positions--scale clerk, accounts payable clerk, accounts receivable clerk and even office manager. it would be really cool to be the go-to girl for once. i like being a know-it-all.

still, it's not what i want. i'm sick of changing jobs and the idea of changing jobs so i can have a job where i'm always changing jobs sounds terrible.

the really fucked up thing is that they've actually hired another scale clerk, which they can't possibly need, at noblesville, since i said i was available to come back to martin marietta. i don't understand why i wasn't considered for that job at all. i guess they think i'm overqualified and want me in this other position, but don't i get to choose what position i'm applying for?

fuck! that really pisses me off! i hadn't thought about all of this.

i'm working the hours no one wants for a bullshit temp wage with no benefits and their going to force me into taking a job i don't want so that maybe someday i might have a chance to move to a different office?!?!!?

well, i guess i've made up my mind. thanks, livejournal.

but, if i don't take this offer, i'm told i'll never be considered for any other position again (which i think is completely fucked up).
Tags: martin marietta, walsh, work
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