“Weather is always going to play a role in outdoor sports,” explained event sponsor Mayor McCheese. “True competitors are going to be out there, preparing--rain or shine--but these backyard, weekender-types are afraid to just jump in and get their feet wet.”
Despite late-afternoon sun, yesterday, contenders residing in the Yardlympic Village took the day off for rest and relaxation. The contestants even put together a hot date of sorts, sharing a homemade meal and a movie, before retiring to bed.
“Sometimes, you just need a day off,” pronounced horseshoe-favorite Amanda Miller. “Just this week, we invented a whole new sport, right here in the Yardlympic Village. If you don’t think that was hard work, you’re a fucking idiot.”