sWell (shakewell) wrote,

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even in my dreams my life sucks

so i had this dream last night
where i was at some restaurant with like 20 of my friends
my dad was there
and so was my manager tommy from the dial
we were all sitting at one long table
and i was in the middle on the booth side
tommy ordered an appetizer
and was dishing it out to everyone at the table
about halfway down the table he runs out
so my dad starts dishing some out from the other side
now at this time, josh and boone are playing darts somewhere
(a game they call soccer)
and boone somehow throws a dart in the ear of some idiot girl who walks by
then as my dad puts some food on my plate
boone comes over and just stuffs it all in his mouth
i crawl under the table and leave the restaurant
my dad calls me later and says,
"shrug (yes he actually said shrug), i just wanted to eat some food."
that's less interesting than i had hoped for it to be
i did have another more exciting dream too

i was living in this big mansion with my parents
and my dad died
and this secretary chick said something really rude about it
so i fired her
then i had to have her sign some piece of paper about why she was fired
so i went to talk to her
but she kept flirting with me
and getting all hot and bothered
and then i was getting hot and bothered
so i wrote "you're fired" on the paper
and she signed it
and then this huge, purple, two-headed dildo appeared
and you can pretty well imagine what happened after that
pretty hot stuff
too bad i woke up alone

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