sWell (shakewell) wrote,

don't forget to write about this later [miraasan]

it's not that i'm jealous exactly. i don't wish it were me now. i don't want him back. i know i'm better off without him.

it's just that i would have been better off with out him sooner or at all.

i think of all the things he couldn't do for me and i know he just wouldn't.

i think of how he said he still loved me. but it all ended after that one sentence.

i'm mostly just boggled about people in general. i don't know how to differentiate until after the fact. maybe there's no way to tell. maybe we're all the same, it just takes time for it to manifest.

a plane. missed classes (of his senior year).

my first instinct is to say "i wish i'd been good enough for him," but i know that's not really what i mean. in all other things, i discredit his ability to discern greatness. why should my own personal worth be any different, especially when i scorn his determining sense of good character?

that's the trouble of second-hand living.

what i really wish is that i was good enough for me. then i never would have needed him and he never could have hurt me.

or only to a certain point at least.
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.