sWell (shakewell) wrote,


in addition to wandering around what seemed to be circle centre mall trying to find einstein brothers bagels, i also conjured up these little ditties.

natural disaster roller coaster>>
so this dream started out in cook county general hospital (ER). carter was on a flight out to see kem but they had to do an emergency landing. it was winter time. they landed on a field. as carter is doing CPR, he looks across the field and sees someone fall through the ice on a pond. then a limousine disappears like the ground sank beneath it. and the ground just starts falling off into nothingness around the hole.

i'm in a rental cabin with my family. only it's not really my family as far as i can tell. my niece, sadie, is there. it's like thanksgiving or something. the floor cracks but doesn't split entirely. water seeps through. we look outside to see what's up. we can see the world collapsing around us. these houses don't seem to sink. i took sadie to the garage to find her some water wings. she says she doesn't have any, but she's actually wearing them, deflated. i give styrofoam coolers to the other kids in the house.

looking out the window again, i see the other houses sort of floating into a line. i suppose it must be the current or something. we fall into line and then it's like we go over a waterfall or into a whirlpool. the point is, we start falling. now it is my family in the house. they're all sitting around in a circle. i am f r e a k i n g out!

we kind of crash at the bottom and then a voice comes over a loudspeaker telling us to wait until our raft comes to a complete stop before disembarking. the whole damned ordeal was some sort of roller coaster ride and i was the only one who didn't know.

i was a bellhop for a two-story hotel. the other bellhops seemed to be characters from the movie out cold. each floor had 100 rooms, but, starting from the left, they were numbered 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 1, 2, ... . i couldn't remember that scheme and i took my guests to the wrong end of the hall first. they had the first three rooms from the left on the second floor. all their luggage was bright hawaiian print. they were unloading the plane right there at the hotel. waiting for the rest of their luggage, i hopped into the bed in room 96. the guests went off to the swimming pool or something. when all their luggage was off the plane, we loaded it into a black dodge durango and drove that into an elevator. we stacked the bags up in the hallway and left the doors open to their rooms, but not before someone found a hot pink, hand-shaped dildo in one of the bags.

all the bellboys were really hard up to get laid, so they wandered off into this desert and somehow managed to find a pack of women who were not only willing, but were also eager to be double fisted. one of the bellboys passed out, but some chick undressed him anyway. apparently, his size disappointed her, but she tried to get busy anyway. another man approached from a distance and called to her. "coming dear," she called and ran off to meet him.

not far off in this desert, the boys from reno 911 were trying to learn a line dance around a little red barn. they just kept gravitating toward one another and touching each other, though. the man teaching the dance kept breaking them up and scolding them.

sopranos family picnic>>
as it turns out, some of the guys from the sopranos were also at this line dance lesson. they were too drunk to deal, so they headed back over to this field between a house on a hill that looked quite similar to the lanier mansion and a run-down old a-frame in shallow valley. artie was in the back room of the shack throwing up baked beans. janice and junior were making dinner for carmine in the kitchen. together, they plotted to knock him off, but then janice made look like it was all junior's doing. junior flipped out and ran up to the mansion. right in the middle of the field there was a three-piece band set up. there was a little kids drum set (bass, snare, cymbal). little richard was playing guitar. and tony was singing "danke shoen." junior comes out of the mansion with bobby and their both cracking each other's skulls with hockey sticks. then tony's mom comes out screaming that no one loves her anymore. tony asks me to sit in on drums and tells me not to stop playing. then he strangles his mother.
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