September 28th, 2005


girl talk

i'm really out of practice with all this girl talk. people seem to appreciate what i have to say, but i can't help but wonder if they don't really deserve my harsh realism in the wake of their personal drama.

sometimes, i think it's not about if you can do better; it's just about if you deserve not to do that bad. like, having a mate (however compatible/mismatched) isn't end-all to life's problems for me. you shoudln't have to put up with bullshit just so you're not alone.

but what do i know? i'm going to be a drunken old bag lady. and what do you call those single old women? old maids! that too.

i guess i'm all about having a lot of good people in my life instead of just that one. cuz my ones haven't been all that great after all. and, from what i've seen, no one's are. i dunno.

i'm a bitch.


pussy posse was almost in full effect tonight (joewelie, menlie, kyla, alex). dom, ben, dave(i'm not looking up his lj name, cuz he never updates), chris, fleck, and plenty of other dudes. slater. colin b! neil $30 burns. geek. wayu (who said he enjoyed watching dudes lay the mack down on me). lots of cats. it was pretty cool.

i'm so fucking scene it's a wrap.
party's over

orange crush

i really like having crushes.

for the moment, i'm prefectly content not even coming remotely close to dating. no plans. no phone calls.

just plain old infatuation.
the chains of love

one is the loneliest number OR two can be as bad as one

i used to be completely engulfed in this mindset. people think not having a significant other means being alone. people think having a significant means not being alone.

but i've felt just as alone in some of my relationships as i've ever felt outside of them. and i've known a lot of girls (and maybe even some boys) who become more isolated as they pair off.

consequently, i know a lot of people became more social with more people only after they parted from their lovers.


more later. i'm hungry.

sweater cake lives!

i accidentally made sweater cake again. oh god! it was quite an unpleasant surprise. another surprise, my dishwasher is broken. i think i knew that, but gave up on ever having it repaired ans started storing pots and pans in there. i really don't want to wash that sweater cake by hand.

i went to the grocery today. i was nearly done when i realized all i had in the cart was carbs and cheese. so, i bought some fruit. i don't know much about fruit. today, i cut a cantaloupe for the first time (and also used my BIG knife for the first time too). i also got some pears, but i think i maybe i only like them when they're soaked in heavy syrup.

i tried to buy meat, but i couldn't deal with it so i bought some boca burgers instead. close enough, right?

man, i'm hungry again...