February 12th, 2004

sqeez

i thought you stopped reading

you know, it's great that you're loved by him.

but it's too bad you never realized you were loved by others.

i don't write much love always because it looks cute at the end of an email

i write it because i mean it.
  • Current Mood
    sad
sqeez

what a bitch

eh, fuck her anyway.

but what's with the shit she writes?

does she think i'm jealous of her relationship with phil?
or that i want phil or something?
it's like she's always selling what a fabulous guy he is
and how lucky and thankful she is to have him.
and i do mean selling.
it seems really strange to me.
i feel like she's trying to rub it in my face or something.

maybe i'm reading too much into it.
i don't know.
but there just seems to be something off about the things she writes.
of course, i've never seen much of her writing.
so maybe that's just how she is.
maybe her remarks that are implicitly directed at me
throw me off about the rest of what she has to say.

maybe she's just a dumb bitch
and i should quit caring about her at all.
  • Current Mood
    inquisitive
sqeez

blue power node under construction

i love that i'm trying to study
:::memorize:::
and all i can think about are red and blue power nodes
being constructed and destroyed

i'd ask him to turn it down
or use his headphones
but there's no point
he'll just use my request as some lame excuse to be a prick
:::again::::

besides,
shouldn't he know by now
that no one else wants/needs to hear that shit?
  • Current Mood
    annoyed
sqeez

v-day d-day

just made some valentine's day cupcakes
but after today's episode
and it's bitter reminder of relationships in my past
i wonder if i'll have anyone to share them with

self-sabotage:
i know i'm doing it.
i don't want to do it.
but still i do it.

i wish it really was so easy
that i could just turn this off.
  • Current Mood
    blah