June 20th, 2002


damn the man [melo]

had a job interview at ups today. i showed up at 2.45 for my 3 o'clock appointment. but i didn't get in until 4. that was pretty annoying. especially since they told me to plan on being there for only an hour - and that was supposed to be for the actual interview.

the interview itself only took ten minutes and consisted of some human resources guy telling me how wonderful i was for filling out my application completely and that he knew everything about me from my handwriting.

all in all i think it went well, but i'm not too excited about it. i could make $9.50 an hour, which is pretty hot, but i'll only be working 25 hours a week at most. take out taxes and union dues (grrr!) and i'll only be bringing home $100 a week on average. that blows! i want to be a telemarketer again.

so, as of right now, that's my only job prospect. i applied at steak and shake yesterday, but they were supposed to call me today and they didn't. that's ok with me. i'd be a horrible waitress.

customer: "this isn't what i ordered."
me: "fuck off."

i don't think i'd bring home many tips with an attitude like that.

i need a goddamn job, though. it's going to cost something like 20 grand for school next year. ouch. why on earth did i decide to go out of state?

on that note, i should probably get off the interweb and call back some possible employers. wish me luck.

dancing with myself [melo]

i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror
just a moment ago
it was just me
in a tank top and sweat pants
but there was something in the way i moved
it caught my attention
because i never purposefully look in the mirror
but i looked just now
and i stopped

and i wanted to dance.

i would be surprised [melo]

... if i became a stalker. or psychotic. or both. or if i already am.

in fact, i think i already am. at least i know i used to be. and i'm getting back some of those terrible habits.


he wants space. to him, that means hanging out with his friends, playing computer games and getting set up with a phat job. for me, that means looking for a job i don't want and getting rejected, sitting at home waiting for him to call and thinking about how much i miss him.

"we were together everyday for nearly 2 weeks straight. it was fun, but it was way to much."

"its not real. we can't do that forever."

yeah i guess not.