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ahh... sweet release

and then there was sleep.

it was the first time in a long time that i went to bed without futurama. no one to spoon with. no warm, fuzzy jammies. just me. total darkness and total silence.

i didn't actually expect to fall asleep when i went to bed. i didn't even feel drowsy anymore. i was excited. anxious. curious. so, i just lay* down to think. i searched my memories for stories to tell. i tried to think of new and unique xmas plans. i made collages with my imagination.

*irregular verbs can go suck a dick, by the way

for once, i wasn't frantically reaching for sleep. so, it came to me quickly. the numbness washed over me. i felt it creep up from my toes. it poured down over my face. it crawled up from my fingertips. and for a minute, i just listened to my heart beat and gradually calm down.

i had some amazing, amazing dreams. had to hit the snooze button so that i could appreciate them just a little while longer before they vanished into the morning fog.

i'd give anything to sleep like that every night.

xxx

two dudes got fired from the x. i find it hilarious, since i have such a horrible attendance problem and they showed up everyday. i guess my killer work ethic more than makes up for that though. they've never even mentioned that i'm thin ice over absences. suckers.

i remembered today that i'll get some tuition reimbursement monies from the x eventually. ahhh... free money. thank god.

today is my last day of class. i am so excited that i probably will not go. class is for jerks.

i need to start speaking more japanese at home again. i've gotten for to out of practice in the last couple of weeks. i really wish i had more friends who were also learning it this year. i just want to hang out and talk japanese for as long as i can. i'm writing letters to opiate, but it's not the same. good practice, but not the same.

and, now, i think i'll slip into something a little more comfortable. [my nasa approved sweedish sleep sytem. har. har.]

Comments

( 4 comments — Say Something )
menlie
Dec. 9th, 2004 02:45 pm (UTC)
i think it is really cute that you have all of these giftmas ideas & aspirations. i really haven't felt too inspired to give this year... this needs to change!!!
shakewell
Dec. 9th, 2004 02:49 pm (UTC)
the cookies i was going to make were just a cop out so that i wouldn't have to show up anywhere empty handed. it's only been in the last week that i actually wanted to do certain things for certain people. i'm sure during finals week next week i'll get pissed with everything and scrap it all. heh. but hopefully the mood will hit you soon too.
dano_rocks
Dec. 9th, 2004 03:22 pm (UTC)
futurama and spooning at the same time?? i'll have to put that on my 'to-do before I die' list haha
shakewell
Dec. 10th, 2004 04:46 am (UTC)
everyone should
it's glorious!
( 4 comments — Say Something )

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