sWell (shakewell) wrote,


i can't stop snooping. it's not even interesting anymore, but i still do it. it doesn't help that i have nothing but free time here in the computer lab and that he never changes anything (besides his sexual preference).

speaking of the testing lab, nemia (my boss) refuses to teach me about some things. everyday i come in and ask her what to do or where to refer to for these certain tests, but she just tells me not to worry because she'll be around. well, she's never around when i need her. i call her office, i call her cell phone--no answer. she just leaves for hours and doesn't even give me notice about how long she'll be gone (and i'll be stranded here with no assistance).

and, by the way, you wouldn't believe how ridiculously redundant the paperwork is around here. there are so many forms to fill out or print or hi-light that it's impossible to make any logical sense of the process. oh well, whatever. fuck it!

things are getting real bad at fed ex. it's so not fun at all anymore. the trainees keep quitting and apparently no one feels like doing their job anymore. i leave at eight on the days i work in the lab and my manager gives me shit about it every single time (even though i was told the shift would end at or before eight when i was hired). i could argue with him and i think i'd like to go off on him again, but i just don't have the time or the energy anymore.

my dad said it was good that i was learning not to fight against everything all the time. he was mostly referring to how i don't fight back when people pick on me at work. i'm not sure if it's good or not. it's good because things just die out quickly like that, but it's bad that i don't stand up for myself. but why should i? what have i got to prove to those assholes? why should i care what they think of me?
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