what a fucking pain this is!
i'm going to start wearing my wedding band again. (banjo gave it to me.) i doubt it will stop many silly boys from opening their fat fucking mouths, but then i will be able to act completely offended and not seem abnormal.
i don't know why it seems easier to lie about my situation than to tell the truth. i'm too nice to people. i'd really like to tell all these guys to just fuck right off. but even though in my head i know i have every right to, i can't stand hurting, offending or embarrassing people face to face.
and i just realized that i'd much rather be the one making the first move than be the one being pursued. i'd say that used to stem from self-esteem issues and now it's just a habit, but who knows. what i do know is that i don't like be hassled, bothered, pestered, hounded or stalked.
did you know i've never been dumped? i figured that out a few weeks ago. that seems so bizarre to me. of course, i run for cover when things start to look bad, so it's not surprising to me that i would burn my bridges too.
i leave you with this, from a boy a went to breakfast with just one time. [i'm more powerful than i can even comprehend.]
after all this time i've still got you on my mind, don't know what to think just want to see you one more time. Wish i could just move on but ever time i try toughts of you is all i find..... Amanda i just want you to know i still think about you after this all this time
don't know what you did to me but some how you have changed me, you melted my heart and made me feel and for that i should say thanks.... and honestly i would love to see you at least just one last time.... Well if you want call me