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forty ounces to freedom

played photographer for a ridiculous house party where edward fortyhands was played. having never seen the game played, i had quite a good time watching things unfold.



but, as everyone else got drunk, i stayed sober and got tired and annoyed.

it upsets me how people who seem so genuine and kind the rest of the time can become such colossal douche bags when they get a little alcohol in them. and it's not just the typical drunk pranks, it's the stuff beyond that that really gets me. and it's the fact that they can't keep themselves from doing it, even when they know they've gone too far.

i lost a lot of respect for a lot of people last night, people i thought were my friends. but now i've seen how two-faced and cruel they truly are and i'm ashamed that i ever thought they were good people.

my judgement is shit.

however, i've never been so happy to feel alone amongst others before.

Comments

( 5 comments — Say Something )
ladyjay19
Mar. 16th, 2008 10:21 pm (UTC)
"i lost a lot of respect for a lot of people last night, people i thought were my friends. but now i've seen how two-faced and cruel they truly are and i'm ashamed that i ever thought they were good people."

I feel like I spend way, way to much time in my life repeating that exact same few phrases over and over again.

I always think I've learned my lesson. And then my nice new friend becomes a raving lunatic douche bag, and I start to wonder how it's possible to miss the mark of goodness so often.
tannomano
Mar. 16th, 2008 11:26 pm (UTC)
Being sober is tough at times. And a lot of the time is from drunkards being retarded and having to deal with it. But it does let open the courtains.
beatfreak
Mar. 17th, 2008 04:49 am (UTC)
So I guess you feel like people act out who they truly are inside when they're drunk? The past several years I've started to believe that that's true more often than not (though not without exception), which makes me feel really disappointed in a lot of people--certainly not least of all myself.
shakewell
Mar. 17th, 2008 11:49 am (UTC)
absolutely
there are definitely exceptions. in fact some people open up a lot more open and are nicer when they're boozed up.

but it's been my experience that most of my friends and i tend to amp up the beligerance (which can be annoying, but is not altogether unacceptable) and violence (mostly towards property, but occasionaly toward other people). my newer, non-madison/bloomington friends acquaintances allow alcohol to turn up the dial on their outright meanness to people (with horrible nicknames, insults about physical attributes people have no control over and unkind pranks).

i know i definitely have a problem with the beligerance part. the more drunk i am, the more adamant i am about getting everyone else (particularly other girls) more drunk than me. also, my competitive side comes out and i talk WAY more shit when i'm drunk.

but i don't destroy people's stuff or steal from them. i don't think i've ever sharpied some passed out kid or posed them in lewd pictures. (if i did, it was before i was 18.) and the last time i used a mean nickname was 7 or so years ago too.

so, i know alcohol lowers a person's inhibitions. and what that seems to mean is that people seem a lot more comfortable and are even happy to let their hidden, inner douche bag out, once they get a few drinks in them.

(this comment is way too long and rambling. sorry.)
beatfreak
Mar. 19th, 2008 04:44 am (UTC)
Re: absolutely
Eh makes sense. I've come to realize that although people might not have meant to say or do the things they said or did when they were drunk, they usually did absolutely mean them.
A mean or cruel side of me doesn't usually surface when I'm drunk (though it has before) but all of my insecurites come pouring out if I'm not careful and I say or do things that I would probably never do sober... because I know it would make me look crazy.
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